So what is it with some people who can’t handle getting “good” at something? I’m posting this on a modeling forum but it applies to more than just this subject. I’ve worked with GM for almost twenty years and I got pretty good at being an automotive technician especially in the electrical end of things. I say that not to toot my own horn but to point out that I always seemed to remember where I came from and always knew that I had more to learn. In short I never reached, nor ever claimed to reach a plateau where I thought I was better than the next guy. I knew this one technician who was really all that and a bag of party mix when it came to fixing a car. I mean this guy was really good and he was a really nice guy. In addition to his great skills he became “GM World Class Certified” through his years in GM manufacture specific training. It was after this that this guy developed a severe case of the dumb. He literally fell off of the planet in regards to reality thinking that he was God’s gift to the automotive repair community. Any time a technician had a question they learned to steer clear of this fella. Sometimes he would walk around and find them to critique their work out of the blue doing so with that “holier than thou” attitude. I must point out that this was all unsolicited advice given with attitude.
I’ve seen the same thing happen in the modeling community as well. I’ve seen folks who were easy going and fun to talk with on the forums who knew their stuff yet when they go to “the next level” or get a couple of wins at the shows they become pompous and arrogant. Again these particular folks seem to fall off the planet in terms of being a little “too good” and offer unwelcome advice with attitude. We’ve all seen them come……………and go. Don’t get me wrong, constructive criticism is always welcome but intrusive and rude approaches to it are not. What’s the turning point for people to totally disregard where they came from and to start acting an or better than the next guy? Who are we to criticize any work we see at a show or on the forums with the attitude that we would never buy such an expensive kit only to do what is considered “substandard” work to it? How do we know the guy who built it? Maybe he or she is handicapped or maybe they are really young or just getting into the hobby. I don’t see a lot of it going on here thankfully but if you look around long enough in the modeling community, you’ll see it for sure.
Coming back around to my initial question, What is it with these people? My theory is that as the knowledge is gained it seems to put some folks “above” others. Maybe I’m all wet. I’d like to hear your thoughts on this one.
I hope I am always able to keep my head and remember where I came from, am always friendly and approachable, always be able to learn more and retain some amount of humility no matter how good I get at this hobby. Hats off to all here who pitch in and make this an enjoyable, supportive and encouraging place to be , Joe
Not sure if I completely understand if you are asking for opinions on how to handle such behavior or just how to put up with it without hawling back and taking a swing at the unwelcome " advisor" .
I know someone in a local IPMS club like that. I don’t let him bother me, but then I don’t enter contests.
If someone offers unrequested “advice” and I have time to listen, I will listen long enough to determine if the advice is useful. If it is useful, I will ask questions for specifics.
If the advice is not useful or I already know the information, then I will try to politely cut the session short as I have little enough time left on this planet and don’t wish to waste my remaining time.
OTOH, if the advisor is a supervisor, then finding an intermittent electrical fault might be easier to deal with.
Short answer from me is that my time is prioritized with survival, family and earning a living taking priority.
I guess I was just mentioning it because of curiosity. We come to places like this because we enjoy the hobby and you get some folks to take it to an upscaled level of seriousness or whatever and deflate the fun level some.
Well, you’re talking about hubris, I believe, excessive self-confidence or pride, and I am reminded of an example from history, the Roman triumph.
The triumphal procession was just about the highest honor the Romans could award, short of deification, to a commander who won great victories in battle, or won a war. In fact, it was practically a deification, if for a day. You can imagine that someone with the qualities necessary to lead a nation’s army in battle probably has a good, healthy dose of self-confidence to begin with.
Well, the Romans had a keen sense of human nature, and realized that something like the adulation of the nation could send someone already pretty self-confident, cocky, even, over the edge. So, over time, they developed the custom of having someone accompany the victor in his chariot, to repeat the phrase, “Remember that you are mortal.”
It seems wise to remember this at all times, in any of our endeavors, that no matter how good you get, you’re still mortal, there are always new things to learn, proficiency levels to maintain, and there are always others striving to outdo you. When you win the crown, smile, blush and say, “Aw, shucks!”.
I’ve seen a lot of command types come and go over the length of my career. The good ones were just overpromoted police officers/detectives. Their egos, their personalities, everything about them, exuded self confidence. No cockiness, no self promotion, just a dedication to the folks who worked for them and the job itself.
These guys and gals always put the well being of the troops first. They knew that their people would work their azzes off because the boss had their back.
The bad ones, marginal and truly incompetent, were the group who felt entitled to lead. It’s the “I are smart, I got promoted, see?” syndrom.
The inadequate personalities always pushed them to dominate, fearing exposure of their own flaws. Self promotion and laziness are hallmarks. These folks always look good in the eyes of upper management, they make it that way. Through force, coercion and outright domination they make themselves look grandiose. These guys and gals talk a good game but when it comes time to put up or shut up, they will toss anyone who is perceived as a threat to their image under the bus.
Some types just need their ego to be fed. If nobody tells them they’re great, they’ll tell everyone they’re great, through belittling and berating others. Overcompensation for their own inadequecies somewhere in the life. Narcissistic and sociopathic. Don’t know that there’s any science or fact to support this, but in my experience, those tendencies seem to be more prevalent with the first born.
X2 have had a couple of squadron CO’s like that, but have also had shop chiefs that I would crawl through a J-79 from one end to the other for…
I’ve been lucky in that most of my co-workers and bosses on the civvy side have been good ones—only one PIA and that was when I spent 2 years painting motorhomes…
The world wonders… But seriously, folks like that can take the pleasure out of anything. I have come across plenty of LAMs (Look At Me!) in the military and in law enforcement over the past 30+ years. I have learned about them, about myself, and about the difference between competence and confidence.
I think most of us here choose to partake in this hobby for enjoyment and relaxation. Folks like that tend to kill both aspects of that. But in the long run, no matter how good one is at this hobby, in the long run it is just that. A HOBBY. The fate of nations, communities or mankind does not depend upon our actions here. Only our own individual contentment.
Getting good at your job is expected, it’s how you earn a living. The better you are, the more chance for better pay. This is of up-most importance, it’s how you pay your mortgage, pay-off your car loan, feed you family, and pay your taxes.
This is what a hobby is to me:
Hobbies should be about relaxing and getting away from the daily grind. A hobby should be fun, entertaing, and therapeutic. There’s nothing wrong with getting good at your hobby, but there is also no deadline or timeframe to do so. If a hobby becomes a chore, it is no longer a hobby. If your hobby becomes your job, it is no longer a hobby.
I’ve been comming to this forum on and off for years. I stopped visiting this site after a certain person started spouting off about almost everything. I just became tired of it. I come to this forum to have fun and talk to people who enjoy this hobby. I also like to learn what i can, but I will never be pressured to be a perfectionist, or try to meet others so called model building standards. Most of the guys who visit this forum are friendly, easy going individuals, but some just come across as over bearing blowhards (no names).
If your a perfectionist, thats fine, but you shouldnt destroy a forum that is designed for fun.
Having a "visible’ ego and/or arrogance about anything is pretty ridiculous…especially when it’s about making little plastic airplanes. So what if you’re great…if you’re a jackwagon about it, nobody’s gonna want anything to do with you. Just like a beautiful woman, who knows she’s beautiful and has the attitude that goes along with it…she becomes very ugly. An average woman with a great attitude is far more attractive.
. He literally fell off of the planet in regards to reality thinking that he was God’s gift to the automotive repair community. Any time a technician had a question they learned to steer clear of this fella. Sometimes he would walk around and find them to critique their work out of the blue doing so with that “holier than thou” attitude. I must point out that this was all unsolicited advice given with attitude.
, Joe