You invite a modeller friend over, and you see him taking a bottle of paint.....what would you do?

General Discussion General Modeling Discussion
1

[:(DD]

It just unimaginable!

2

Personally, Id just say “If you need it, why don’t you just ask.” Oh yeah, and that would be the last time he was in my home. If he will pack off a $2 to $4 bottle of paint, what else will his sticky fingers glom onto…the better halfs jewelry maybe?

3

Two things:

  1. Ask him to wear a helmet, because bottle number two will be pitched at his head.

  2. Find a better friend.

4

Wow, just wow.

5

What goldhammer said. I’d confront him outright.

6

…“Hey…I bought that, because I need it”.

Zero hesitation.

7

Be careful who you allow into your home.

8

I would just help paint his or her kit, making sure it was the right color and type of paint. The cost of paint is totaly trvial to me. Other modeler friends are very nice to have. Heck, I even let them use my brushes a air brushes. I have done it lots of times.

9

Yea, but someone who steals from you isn’t your friend, even the smallest thing.I couldnt care less about the cost of the paint,it’s just a low life move.It’s just unacceptable conduct under any circumstances,unless he has admitted to psychological issues.

I probably wouldn’t confront him,but he wouldn’t step foot in my house again.

10

You are missing the point here. That is not a friend but a thief. If he takes a small bottle of paint without asking, then ask yourself what else that belongs to you will stick to his fingers on his way out of your house?

Time to remove this low life from your friend list.

11

Man you’ve gotta be kiddin’ me!! I’m not going to call names or nothin’ like that but I’d be careful of letting this dude back in your place. Sooner or later you’ll meet a fellow modeler that’s not dishonest. Odds are if he did it once, he’ll do it again and maybe on a bigger scale if given half a chance. Separate the fact that he’s a fellow modeler and what do you have? Someone who can’t be trusted. Boil it down to plain ethics to see things clearly for what they are without your judgment being clouded by “a modeler with a common interest”. Real friends won’t steal from you no matter how small or inexpensive your belongings are.

12

I have found that you have to say something right away if you see something like that. A lot of times, not only do you rectify the situation, but you save the both of you a lot of awkwardness or heated moments later.

For example, “Hey, where you going with my paint?” said right then, as opposed to weeks down the line saying, “So, I saw you take my paint.” Just sets you up for ugliness. If he’s truly your friend, calling him on it immediately isn’t gonna ruffle feathers nearly as much.

Also, kleptomania is a real thing. Some people truly can’t help themselves. A little understanding and grace might go a long way. I do agree, though, that if he comes in your house again, it would be wise to keep a sharper eye on things.

–Chris

13

Good Grief!! What kind of friends do you folks have? I’ve been modeling over 50 years and even though one friend was deparate enough that he needed to store his models at my place while he found a new apartment, noone has attempted to ‘take’ anything of mine. They know that if they needed something all they’d have to do is ask and esp. for something a minor as a bottle of paint I’d give it to them. In fact, I’ve had friends over to build models and have given a kit for one to build.

So basically, the whole premise of this scenario to me is illogical as it’s a strawman argument. never happen.

14

let it go. a $3.00 jar of paint? not really a deal breaker. Unless you like conflict and fighting, put away tour injured pride and show somw grace to this person. you don’t know why he did it and looksing a friend for a jar of paint seems that you would be loosing much more than $3.00 in the long run.

15

Set a mouse trap or maybe in your case, a rat trap.—just kidding of course.

16

Set a mouse trap or perhaps in your case, a rat trap.—Just kidding of course. Oops, it wasn’t registering so I sent it again. (still good advice).

17

Again if you got friends who steal from you,then their not worth having.Conflict fighting,no not me,just won’t be with them anymore.

They could ask if they need it that badly.My only exception would be if they have some sort of psychological issue that I am aware of and they are working on.

It has nothing to do with pride or grace.why would you want to be with someone who steals from you.

18

Ditto on saying something to him right away. I’d gladly give it to you IF you ask. If you don’t, and I see it, the next thing you hear and feel will be the door hitting you in the a** on your way out.

Jim [cptn]

19

I’d confront him immediately about his behaviour. If you let it go, he will justify, to himself, that what he did is okay because you did nothing about it at the time of the offence. An honest person, when caught, will fess up. If he denies taking the paint, your friend is a thief and a liar. I won’t invest my time with people like that. And as other have said, he’d never set foot in my house again or ever hear the sound of my voice.

20

It’s pure ethics against “minimal dollar” value. If it’s only $3 then why couldn’t he ask? I’m not above showing grace but hey, stealing is stealing large or small. Ask and you’ll get. Plain and simple. Also I don’t believe it’s about injured pride. That would be putting the other persons wrong action on the owner of the paint. Part of having a friend is trust. The next right thing would have been to ask for the paint and not take it is all I’m trying to say. One last thing, confrontation does not always have to end badly. A simple "Please put that paint back and you could ask if you need it. " will do fine. It establishes accountability and a boundary. I aint going any further than this as I don’t feel like getting any more into “counselor mode” but I hope you get the picture.